My insecurities seem to have become unwarranted solicitors of my heart and soul as of late. I’ve spent the last three weeks with floods of thoughts and questions:
Am I accomplished? What am I working toward?
Do I look fat?
Should I still be a social worker?
Am I invisible? Can people see me? Do they hear and understand me?
Why did that woman look at me that way when I simply said hello?
Will I be a good mother? Hell, can I have kids? What if I can’t?
Long story short, I’ve driven myself crazy with these fleeting thoughts. It appears that once the proverbial door closes to one issue another one appears. I thought by hanging a cross, a “No Soliciting” sign, and politely asking these insecurities to stop invading my space that maybe the peace I’ve been seeking would finally grace me with its presence.
However, no matter how hard I try the welcome mat is always placed in front of the door to my mind and spirit.